“Well that’s rubbish,” grumbled my oldest daughter in disgust at the newspaper.
“Apparently the world is going to end on 21 December next year – my birthday!”
That is rough news.
So, we might as well get ourselves prepared. And gearing up for the end of the world reminds me of one of my childhood friends, Michelle.
The End Is Nigh!
When I was a teenager, I had a best friend, Michelle, who was a Mormon. We used to spend Saturday afternoons baking trays of lemon bars and then watching horror films on television, hiding behind the throw cushions.
One thing you could count on was Michelle’s mother always having a fully stocked larder.
In our area there were lots of Mormons, so their way of life wasn’t particularly unusual, and the cupboard full of food was one feature I thought was pretty awesome.
This practice meant that the devote Mormons in our neighbourhood were fully prepared for the end of the world.
This is when the true believers all get whisked up to heaven and the heathens like me will sadly perish.
Before the whisking, however, there is a pretty awful period where access to toilet roll, fizzy drinks and breakfast cereal is seriously restricted, looking at some of the supplies Michelle’s mother had stockpiled.
I may have misunderstood this, in my adolescent brain.
Maybe Michelle’s family consumed a lot of breakfast cereal and toilet roll, and buying these in bulk, along with the prosaic bottled water and tinned peaches critical for human survival, was an economical thing to do.
Or, Michelle’s mother may given some thought to what would be the most difficult for the family to live without during Armageddon, and shopped accordingly.
I bring it up because last night I did my own bit of stockpiling, with a t-shirt from GAP.
Possibly The World’s Best T-Shirt
Let me tell you how much I love this shirt.
It is so good, I went back to the store after buying my first one just a few days before, gushing to bemused sales staff like a deranged teenager (or mad old woman, maybe) about how wonderful these shirts were.
I bought not just every colour it comes in, but seconds for emergency replacements when the first lot wear out.
I’m already anticipating the heartbreak I’ll have when these shirts fade and fray at the seams, and I can’t bear it.
Stocking up for Armageddon, maybe, but at least your hair will look good.
Customers’ Favourite Hair Accessories To Stockpile